Psychologists tell what to do during relationship breakup

How to peacefully end a relationship

Be kind and honest, but not cruel. Explain why you want to break up. At the same time, it's not necessary to dissect the other person's faults. When ending a relationship, we should avoid any accusations.

Breaking up in anger usually leads to actions and words that we later regret or blame ourselves for being impulsive. You know each other well, so you also know how to hit each other where it hurts.

Reduce catastrophizing the situation. A breakup is not the end of the world. If you break up with respect and regret it in a few months, you can try to be together again.

Take care to reduce vulnerability factors, such as those that amplify painful feelings from the breakup. Hunger, fatigue, lack of sleep, or a large number of stressors are important levers affecting our emotional reactions.

What is crucial in ending a relationship

The decisive component of a breakup is the actual departure. When exiting a relationship, leave. If your partner still wants to be with you, the worst thing you can do is create the impression that this is not a final decision.

Inform the person how you will gradually change or stop interactions. Specify what type of contact would be more acceptable. For example, initially, only emails, if it's easier.

Offer some time without communication, if possible at all. After a breakup, both of you need to have some mental and physical space to work on your thoughts and feelings.

Keep a journal of negative thoughts

Psychologists advise identifying cognitive distortions and practicing mindfulness techniques regarding them. Acknowledge that thoughts are not facts but rather mental events that can influence your emotions.

Observe your thoughts as passing clouds or repeat anxious thoughts aloud in a cartoonish voice.

Consider the recurring patterns or dynamics in your relationships with partners and family members. Identify any patterns of seeking reassurance, fear of abandonment, or a tendency toward excessive compromise.

Do what brings you pleasure

Engage in activities that bring you joy, even if you don't feel like it. Gradually return to hobbies and social interactions, as these actions can improve your mood and help restore a sense of normalcy.

Consider your values in relationships and what is most important to you. Pay attention to qualities such as trust, communication, respect, and personal growth. Clarifying your values will guide you toward healthier behavior and relationship choices.

Set boundaries

Set boundaries in your relationships based on your values. Talk about your needs and expectations openly and assertively.

Recognize that many life factors are beyond your control, including the outcome of a breakup. Focus on what you can control, such as your attitude, behavior, and choices.

Earlier, we reported on the 5 things men do before breaking up.

We also wrote about why people struggle to let go of their exes for a long time.