Signs of unhealthy and healthy personal boundaries

Signs of healthy boundaries

• trust but verify
• reveal yourself little by little, stopping to see how others react to your disclosure
• establish close relationships gradually
• think about the consequences before giving in to impulse
• express sexuality when you want to be sexual, focusing on your feelings rather than observing your partner's reaction
• establish and value your values, regardless of what others think
• notice when another person shows inappropriate boundaries
• notice when someone violates your boundaries
• say no to food, gifts, touches, sex you don't want
• ask for permission before touching someone
• respect others without taking advantage of someone else's generosity
• respect yourself and give as much as you want, not too much, hoping to please someone
• do not allow others to take advantage of your generosity
• trust your own decisions
• have your own opinion
• know who you are and what you want
• understand that friends and partners cannot read minds
• clearly articulate your desires and needs, understanding that you may be rejected, but you can ask
• be a loving parent to yourself
• speak to yourself softly, with humor, love, and respect.

Signs of unhealthy boundaries

• tell everything to anyone
• engage in intimate communication on the first meeting
• fall in love with a new acquaintance
• be overly obsessed - consumed by another person
• act on the first sexual impulse
• be sexual not for yourself, but for your partner
• go against personal values or rights to please others
• not notice when someone sets inappropriate boundaries
• not notice when someone violates your boundaries
• accept food, gifts, touch, or sex when you don't want to
• touch someone without asking
• take as much as you can get for the sake of getting
• give as much as you can give for the sake of giving
• allow others to take from you as much as they can
• allow others to control your life
• allow others to describe your reality
• allow others to define (evaluate) you
• believe that others can predict your needs
• expect others to meet your needs automatically
• experience failure for someone to take care of you
• self-violence
• sexual and physical violence
• food and chemical abuse.

Also, read what you definitely should know when breaking up.

This material is for informational purposes only and should not be used for medical diagnosis or self-treatment. Our goal is to provide readers with accurate information about symptoms, causes, and methods of detecting diseases. RBС-Ukraine is not responsible for any diagnoses that readers may make based on materials from the resource. We do not recommend self-treatment and advise consulting a doctor in case of any health concerns.