How parents should respond to their children's first love without harming them
Psychologist explained how to talk to a child about his or her first love (photo: Freepik)
First love for a teenager is an important stage in life. It is during this period that the ability to build relationships, understand oneself, and trust others is formed, states Ukrainian psychologist Victoria Hotych. Instead, many parents do not attach importance to this or, even worse, devalue the child's feelings.
Stay open for conversations
Your child needs to feel that you are always there for him or her and are ready to listen to him or her without judgment. If your son or daughter shares their feelings with you, they trust you. Instead of laughing or devaluing them, thank them for their honesty and show them that it is important to you.
Don't devalue feelings
Under no circumstances should you devalue feelings and call them frivolous, childish, or adolescent! This is painful and will lead to a child's closeness. After all, the experience of first love is realistic and meaningful for your teenager. So it's important to recognize them.
Support, not control
You should not forbid your child to communicate with the object of sympathy or severely limit the relationship, as this can cause even greater resistance and rebellion. After all, all of the child's emotions are now in a heightened state. Instead, help your child understand how to build healthy communication in relationships: respect for personal boundaries, honesty, and mutual understanding.
The importance of respect
Whenever possible, discuss what respect means in a relationship, how to respond to discomfort or violations of personal boundaries, and how to recognize healthy and unhealthy relationships. You can do this after watching controversial scenes in movies, reading about them in books, and in real life.
Share your own experiences of first love
This will also be a step towards creating a more trusting environment. Tell us how you experienced your first feelings, and how your parents reacted. You can even share moments that you consider to be your mistakes. This will help your child feel that you understand him or her and strengthen your closeness.
Let them learn from experience
At the same time, allow your child to learn from your experience. Childhood love is a valuable experience, even if it is sometimes accompanied by disappointment. Do not rush to intervene and overprotect your child from emotional difficulties. It is better to support them in overcoming these experiences!
Your understanding and support will help your child to go through this period with faith in themselves and in the relationship.
